Thursday, October 29, 2015
The word "maybe" is used to convey uncertainty. The use of the word "maybe" has risen dramatically since its inception in the early 1800's. Have we become less decisive? I believe we have become lazy and non-committal. Frankly, when I have invited someone to a get together, an event, or anything requiring a "yes" or "no" response and I get "maybe" what I actually hear in my mind is, "If I haven't gotten a better offer..." I find everything about the word lazy.
By all means just say, "Well if nothing better is happening then," or "I just don't feel like it." Although, I would much rather hear, "Let me look at my calendar and I will get back to you." (So long as you do get back to me. And this would typically happen within the next 24-48 hours depending on when the event in question is going to occur.) These choices might be a much more pleasant option as you may not want to attend the event, (which is within your right) but you don't want to say no in a face-to-face situation. Thereby avoiding any further inquiry. Though, if it is an interaction between myself and someone, there would be no further inquiry. If you wanted to share your reasons for not attending that is completely up to you, however, I would not ask why you cannot attend! That is simply none of my business.
This might be the reason why people lean on the "maybe" for lack of wanting to come up with excuses why they cannot or will not attend. I am much more likely to pursue you when you give me a maybe than a no. Simply because the "maybe" is just a cop-out. It's your lack of commitment, your attempt at politeness not wanting to offend or it is flat out an excuse to keep the person at bay until you have exhausted all your options.
Honesty never offends me. Be honest! Yes, honesty can sting a little however, I would take a thousand stings of honesty over a lazy, non-committing, flat out lie of a "maybe" any day. After all, you know if you can or cannot attend. You know if you want or do not want to attend. The only thing standing in your way is your lack of being honest with me. You can hurt me if you are honest but I can and will get over it and I will have nothing to hold against you. Lie to me, and you have not only hurt me, as you did not respect me enough to tell me the truth, but you have made me leery of trusting you on any level.
Give me a YES! Give me a NO! Give me "I'd rather have my teeth drilled without Novocain." But for the sake of not looking like a lazy liar, please, do not give me MAYBE!
Posted by MommaHattie at 12:02 PM